She dreamed of the day you would arrive.. of course she didn't know what she was getting herself into, not really. She knew you'd be beautiful, she knew she'd love you, and that your life together would be a journey like no other. She just didn't quite understand the details of parenting, the unique dynamic between you that would make it so.

She didn't know you would burst her heart wide open making her vulnerable once more to life's greatest joys and deepest sufferings, which in turn would develop a sometimes infinite sense of compassion for all of mankind. She didn't know that she would feel the weight of mother's guilt for never quite getting it right. She didn't know then that she would worry about so many things, that your pain and struggle would be felt as though it were her own and your joys would be a great reward! When she tired, she would continue on out of pure love and devotion and funnily enough when she finally learnt to rest, this would also be for you. For your best interests. She didn't know that you would teach her so much about life. About how to stop doing and how to just be, about laughing, about deep sharing and sensitivity. She didn't know a child could be a dear friend. I guess she just didn't realise that when she became a Mum she'd always want more for you than she ever wanted for herself.